Co-parenting brings certain challenges to the parental relationship However, working together with a parent who has anger problems creates an even more challenging situation. And, of course, anger can be quite harmful and keep both parents in a non-productive cycle.
If you are the parent who is likely to be more reasonable, you might want to use strategies that will help keep the peace. But it’s also important that you not give away your power. So in this article you will find a few tips to help you in this situation.
Are You Aware of Your Triggers?
Be Aware of your Co-parent partner's triggers!
IDENTIFY WHAT TRIGGERS YOU:
One thing I’ve noticed that has changed over the past twenty (20) years is that everyone is a psychology expert when it comes to assessing their co-parent. It’s not uncommon for a parent who is seeking legal advice in a custody arrangement to blurt out “He’s a sociopath!” or “She’s a narcissist!” Psychologically assessing the other parent has become a common occurrence because of the ability to access information on the internet.
And these days, everyone wants to talk about how the other parent “triggers” does tings to “trigger” them. Well, the reality is that you might actually face situations where your co-parent may say or do things that will trigger you. This can easily happen if you have not identified the things or events that can trigger you. Your co-parent may well know what triggers you and actually say or do things to invoke that trigger. But there might be situations where that co-parent has no idea what triggers you.
No matter what the other parent says or does, stay calm and reaffirm to yourself that you have control over your own emotions – no matter what! Wishing that the other person would change is not likely to happen. You don’t need the other co-parent to meet your emotional needs. Just make sure that you don’t react and avoid any emotional outbursts. Don’t raise your voice or get loud or out of control with them. Make sure you check your emotional thermostat at all times.